i only feel sexual attraction towards my partners, and they have to be sexual first. if they’re not sexual people, i only feel romance to them and no sexual feelings. i frankly don’t wanna bang anyone and have never felt like actually doing so until i met my partner, and even then, it’s more out of curiosity and romantic sparks than anything else (i’m super romantic so i’m not aromantic).
i only feel sexual feelings under certain circumstances, and even then, i use it to make myself happy and not really wanting to have sex with someone.
i am sure i feel sexual attraction, like probably towards my partner, but i’d say less so than most people do, perhaps???
i’m demisexual for now which is on the ace spectrum.
Only if you consider lying to yourself and others helpful for navigating the world
That’s why sexuality labels and identity labels are best when they’re self chosen. People get to decide for themselves what helps and what fits. And part of that whole process is dealing with other people offering their opinions, whether you asked for them or not. That stuff impacts the labels people choose and/or the labels people choose to share.
Right but self choosing a label doesn’t mean that you define what that label means or if it applies to you. Telling someone the label they have chosen is applicable if they personally think it is appropriate is stupid when they’ve asked specifics about what exactly a label means and how it might apply in the context of their life.
As much as you may think otherwise, sexuality and identity labels aren’t objective. They are subjective and self applied, because it doesn’t matter what label you pick, or how clear cut you think it is, there is someone, somewhere, who uses it differently. There is no single “truth” when it comes to these things.
So yeah, picking a label that helps you navigate the world is the smart choice. Because if you’re trying to pick a label based on some objectively true definition, you’ll fail before you begin, because there is no such thing in this context
If the labels are subjective, how can my interpretation that you’re using them wrong be wrong?
because labels are feelings and your feelings are wrong, or something, but you can’t ever tell anyone else their feelings are wrong.
Real
That’s what people do all the time and why the meaning of labels change over time.
Instead of immediately jumping to conclusions when you hear of a label, the proper reaction should be to just ask for more information and get to know the person more.
That’s the difference between using labels as a tool, or as a discriminator.