Zoift [he/him]

One possibility

Easy and cost effective? Vines. You’ll pay in labor tho.

Depending on your local climate, and also house’s construction & siding, theres probably some non-destructive vines you can get going on trellises or wall-holds. They’ll act as shade barriers to your wall, cool the surrounding air with evapotranspiration, and you can even get some beans out of it.

Downside is that same evapotranspiration is going to act as a wind barrier and potentially hold too much moisture in your siding, but thats usually easily fixed with regular pruning, and it’ll be worst on the off-sun walls that need the least shading anyways.

Wrong type of vines can anchor roots directly into mortar/siding & damage the wall. so do your research. English Ivy can fuck off. Beans & cucurbits work well. Ive personally got Virginia creeper running up some of my brick side-walls.

Stop believing press releases by owners of things explaining how scarily powerful and investable their property is. The threat of AI is worth more than its actual capabilities.

Taking the hypothetical. If “AI” does this, its going to be because it was orchestrated by the AIs owners, for their benefit, to cause chaos they hope to profit from. So you do the traditional things people do with the bourgeisie, and maybe the unhardened, thin-walled infrastructure of datacenters gets blown over some sort of hailstorm.

Tomatos like acidic, well drained soils. Manure will help, as will coffee grounds & tea leaves, peat moss, pine needles, anyrhing with a good amount of tannins. They want lots of water, but dont want to sit with wet roots either, so woodchips or other heavy mulching in the soil will help.

They also tend to need lots of help with nutrients & fertilizer for fruiting. Eggs & other shells will add a lot of calcium they’ll gobble up.

Dont over-do it with mineral/petroleum fertilizer. Itll shoot up at the start and put out lots of foliage, but too high of potassium (K) level will lock out magnesium uptake and hobble the leaves right as its trying to fruit.

Potatos, sweet potatos, & yams are generally held as the most efficient for calories per square meter for single-crop plantings. Almost all tubers and root crops tend to be very forgiving and grow easily, although you should find ones adapted to your local climate.

Beans & peas fix their own nitrogen and can grow in poor soils. Very easy to grow, dry, and store, and makes for good cover crops and tillage. Need a good bit of trellising to make them grow vertically if youre limited in space tho.

Tomatos and peppers are garden staples for being easy to grow and high-yield, but are picky brat plants. Good for novice gardeners, because if they need something they’ll throw an tantrum, wilt till you fix it, and then perk back up in the hour.

Ok, why tho? Not trying to be overly snarky, just genuinely do not understand the mindset. Self-promotion for what end? Who’s your target demographic for your AI art gallery?

Oh boohoo to the landlord, A tenant left a window open. The untold horrors of wear and maintainance of an open window on their house leveraged portfolio asset may almost be enough for them to have to quit landleeching and get a real job.