We had a great 10 year old office-grade printer that kicked the bucket two years ago. Since then we have been through 5 office-grade printers of varying brands and they are all crap.

If you have something that’s been around for a decade, stroke it gently, give it some treats, and tell it what a good printer it is, because that printer is irreplaceable

With you, together tastes better, especially with Coca Cola. Every day with you is an adventure as we taste the rainbow by eating Skittles in bed. Tonight, we’ll put on our Nike shoes and just do it.

What are they supposed to do? Turn away sick people?

“Sorry you think you have an infection. Just deal with it for a few more weeks until I have time”

My grandpa had a handful of stories that he told over and over again. Yes, it got a little hard to laugh and react at the correct parts after 20 listens. But I must say that I would absolutely love the chance to travel back in time and hear him spin one of his yarns again.

A game for the plane ride - can you name all 152,489 states?

When I was a teenager I’d write down questions that occurred to me throughout the day in an agenda, so I would be able to look them up next time I went to the library. I still did the same when we got internet - I’d have a list of things to search at home that evening.

Now we have the bulk of human knowledge at our fingertips and we use it to get likes and followers.

There are worse things than having your butt hole gently cleaned with a cool spray of water for 4 millennia.

He’s now 4000 years old. He had to bide his time until Lemmy came into existence.

“Here is my humble brag about being able to pay triple the cost for a nutrient-void breakfast”

I also find that to be a weird question to consider, as though something must have a purpose to be worthy of existence

In that vein, what is the point of humans? To bring on the 6th mass extinction?

It’s what you get when you image search blue parasaurolophus in DuckDuckGo. I have no doubt it’s AI generated, but I also have zero digital art capability myself

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I agree, I want the meat of the story, not pointless banter and sound effects that reduce information d density

Sometimes when I do this, I imagine an archaeologist finding my book millennia from now and surmising my diet from the accidental smears.

“We have found that Canadians circa 2000-2050 enjoyed a diet that included tangerines and microwave burritos”

In the red states, why would the common law age be younger for girls (12) than it is for boys (14)?

Both are horrifyingly young, but I’m curious what justifies two extra years of child molestation for girls

They’re not, but it’s the wurst kept secret in all of Europe

I’m offended on behalf of platypi

But never voting Democrat. That’s too far.

This bums me out too. Just because something is necessary or inevitable doesn’t make it easy

I suppose you’re right - it could be done on a small scale. I’m so used to seeing massive vats at the sugar bush that I didn’t even think of a small volume in a pot