JackTea

Oh panzer of the lake, why am I still single?

Why is this a shitpost? For lack of anything else, this works.

All of it?

By the time I got to 3, I started having anxious sweats. You know the kind, they smell kinda tart. Don’t like it. No, sir. Staying at 3.

Thanks for picking up what I put down

Same.

And do you ever think about where baby food comes from when you go to the baby store, like Carter’s?

You get pets at a pet store so…

Genius. Bumping so others see this

That’s revolting. You should be ashamed.

box arrives at my door
inside is a small box with a button. A note says in large block letters to never press the button or 1% evil etc
rolls my eyes and grabs my gear to go to work. But sits down. Presses the button many, many times
still pressing

Dexter.

I dunno, dude, let’s hear him out.

I like to point at pregnant people and say “I know what you did a year ago!”
Before they respond, I add, “you went to [insert name of popular baby store]”.
/This initiates confusion. And then implies, like pet stores, you can also buy baby items and a baby.
//yes, I know how pregnancy works. I have to find ways to let my weird out

But why? What was the point of animating live actors into tennis balls? Are tennis balls a critical role in the movies? Why not just use…real balls?