• GimmeUrBelt@lemmy.today
    1·
    1 hour ago

    Aight, I know this comment is gonna bite me later, but I gotta speak my piece. I’m playing devil’s advocate here. Beastiality, zoophilia, whatever you wanna call it… It isn’t always a case of raping the animal. What is consent? It is ultimately an extremely arbitrary idea that humans fling around. For human-on-human interactions, obviously society has cemented it as something with clear-cut lines and rules. But, that’s pretty much where it ends for us. Consent from animals is not something we ever seriously consider in any way.

    Think about it. Did domesticated species, which we have dominated for our benefit, consent? Do dogs consent to anything we put them through as our pets? Do cats? Birds? Bugs?! The answer is no. We cannot communicate with other animals. So we forgo consent when it comes to the animals we interact with. Even when it comes to things that really has no direct benefit to the animal.

    All I’m saying is, rape is rape, for sure. But when it comes to inter-species erotica, as a man once called it, it can’t all be rape. Because animals rely on instinct more than anything, especially when it comes to sex. I guarantee a horse will show you when it doesn’t appreciate it being touched in the no-no spot.

    Okey doke. Bring on the rain. 🙂‍↕️

  • HrabiaVulpes@europe.pub
    1·
    5 hours ago

    Okay, I’m gonna bite this bait - isn’t consent something decided later? Nobody can prove they said “yes or no” later after all so usually it’s based on who we decide to trust.

    • TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      3·
      4 hours ago

      So you’re saying that when you have sex with someone, you don’t know if you’re raping them, but you will find out later and that’s normal?

      Have you ever had sex? And if so, for how many have you been convicted?

      • HrabiaVulpes@europe.pub
        1·
        2 hours ago

        I am saying, that a person can consent now, and then claim no consent and sue you later. Which I hope never happens to you, but the idea is quite an useful loophole.

        • TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com
          1·
          16 minutes ago

          That’s a poor choice in partners if it’s someone who’s trying to fuck you over. And like the list shows, many “yes” are actually a no. Ive never had issues with any partner I had, as I’m respectful and clearly show them a “no” is an answer that’s completely fine. Also, I prefer both not to be drunk or under the influence of whatever when it’s the first time because it doesn’t feel real and I’m not sure if my partner is still happy with their decision the day after (or me). Even one night stands go with proper communication beforehand and sober (or after only ~2 beers).

          So consent should always be defined beforehand, without doubt.

          I’ve also cockblocked many because I was in doubt people would be happy with their decision the day after. “Nope, not going to happen, I will bring you home now. If you still want this tomorrow, you should plan a date together and see where it goes. But tonight, it’s going to be a hard no. Off to bed now.”

          In all cases they thanked me the day after, whether they still wanted it or not. Better safe than sorry.

          By being extra careful and respectful I may have missed out on many opportunities, but at least there’s no one who had regrets or fell forced or anything like that in the moment or the day after.

    • Leomas@lemmy.world
      3·
      5 hours ago

      No, if a person doesn’t want to do something and the other person does something anyway, that breaks consent that second.

      • HrabiaVulpes@europe.pub
        1·
        2 hours ago

        Yes, but what if a person decides that while they may have consented originally during the act, they benefit more from saying they have not consented later on? I’m asking about this being quite possibly a profitable endeavor.

  • gmtom@lemmy.world
    8·
    13 hours ago

    I might get hate for this, but you can still consent when you’re drunk, so long as you’re not like barely conscious drunk or you’re not being manipulated coerced by someone.

    • humorlessrepost@lemmy.worldEnglish
      10·
      12 hours ago

      Yeah, as an alcoholic, I don’t think every sexual encounter I’ve had in the past decade or more was mutual rape.

  • janewaydidnothingwrong@lemmy.world
    16·
    1 day ago

    I feel like you’re allowed to hesistate and still say a “yes” yes, especially since the “threatened and then said yes” is separate on this. It can be complicated and thought over first, no?

  • daannii@lemmy.worldEnglish
    2·
    17 hours ago

    Gonna disagree with the dead one. Being dead isn’t consent.

    Did no one else notice that snuck in?

  • Tiral@lemmy.world
    6·
    22 hours ago

    I’d have to disagree with this. My wife has definitely banged me when I was asleep and or drunk. She didn’t ask, but it was yes from me if she did.

    I don’t think you should use a generic chart as a guide, it isn’t always that simple, because people aren’t that simple. It’s also not very helpful, people who have morals already know this. The other people know this, they just don’t give a shit, it isn’t they don’t understand. There’s a big difference.

    • Hacksaw@lemmy.ca
      10·
      19 hours ago

      This chart is good for hookups. In long term relationships you can negotiate things like asleep and inebriated while sober or through long term safe sane and consensual escalation. Then you get to enjoy things that are hard to enjoy ethically with a stranger. Hell in most kinky contexts most of these are yes and are replaced with a safeword for “no” but you need more trust for that than you can muster with most strangers.